Top 5 Reasons Why Vishwaroopam Should be Banned in Tamil Nadu

              Just heard here and here too last night that the Vishwaroopam screening was (allegedly) banned in Tamil Nadu on request from the Muslim minority representatives and I sort of got the hang of the plausible underlying reasons. Without further ado here are the top five reasons for it.

• #5 - The movie did not really represent the minority of Muslims in Tamil Nadu but rather showed certain elements that exist at large on a global level, which is really an insult to the locals. Of all people, Kamal Hassan being a Tamil movie maker should have given priority to the practices and lives of the Tamil speaking ones rather than what he had shown. 
• #4 - National Muslim groups had their share of limelight with issues like Kashmir, Gujarat and what not, every now and then leading to media attention on them. "The most recent development in Andhra Pradesh on Muslim leaders was the spark to  awaken us and we the Tamil Muslims think tanks decided unanimously to make us 'visible' to gain media attention" said a Tamil Muslim primary school graduate on grounds of anonymity.
• #3 -  Kamal Hassan said in an interview that Muslims are a minority only in this part of the world however they are a major section of people in the world at large. Hence this triggered fears in Tamil Muslims that they might lose all the government ordered perks that they enjoy as minorities if the government sided with the actor in those views.
• #2 - Some Muslims who had worked in this movie had said Kamal Hassan had portrayed a Muslim character with so much deft and authenticity that he could easily  be seen as an age old Muslim. This further triggered fears amongst the Tamil Muslim minorities that if by chance Kamal converts to Islam, he might take over the coveted leadership roles of the current Tamil Muslim leaders across the state of Tamil Nadu.
• #1 - This is the most important reason I believe, which is a two part reasoning when Kamal decided to showcase a special screening of Vishwaroopam to the Tamil Muslim group leaders. One part being, the Muslim leaders had asked for a few hundred more extra tickets for the show so that their extended families could be accommodated for that special screening, which apparently was denied wholly by Kamal. Other part being, after the end of the screening, most of the 'viewers' could not grasp the actual story or portrayal or even the character names for that matter, as they were busy looking for number of Muslims shown and hence they requested Kamal for another show for which he asked them to watch it on DTH, a week later.

PS: This is a pure work of fiction on a satirical front.

PPS: Any resemblance to reality is purely a coincidence, unintentional and unwarranted.

The Promise

It takes months to conspire.

A few think alone while 

some discuss with people, 

for days together.

Minutes of contention 

within one's own self 

followed by

propagation of the decision to the entire world.

A few seconds/minutes/days it holds

&

finally that resolution gets broken.

And hence begins yet another new year!!!

World Headlines in 2060 - World #1

"A guy finds his dad via Google search in 30 seconds"

"What The Guy did in 30 seconds was truly a spectacular feat and I am sure there aren't many in this world who could do that these days"- Google CEO

         In a dramatic event that unfolded at the 30th World's Toughest Quiz, The Guy (he wanted to withhold his name and preferred to be called The Guy) in his early 30s won the coveted "Challenger of the Year" with a prize purse of $100000. In the annual event organized by Google across the globe, the contestants are confined to a room where they have access to any and all latest gadgets and technologies.  They can get to choose any mode of finding the answer and just one thumb rule is that they cannot ask any other human, by any means. The final hurdle set this time was "How quick can you correctly say who your dad is?".  There were 47 finalists this year and apparently this question was rated tougher than last years question of "How fast can you say 'I am a dumb ass', 50 times?" The Guy was able to complete the challenge in just 30 seconds and walk away with the title. 


        When asked about his experience at the final round he said "I knew I was too good with Google, Google+, Facebook etc but then when this question was put forth to me, I went totally blank. It was something which I haven't thought about in my entire life and hence it took some precious 15 to 20 seconds of searching, to narrow down on who my mom was and then the remaining time was used in stalking her profile narrowing down to my dad.  Luckily my dad looked like me, else I would have lost on the contest. My heart goes out to the determined two who're still trying to figure out the answer, 4 hours into the contest."


     As the rules of this contest states there is no time boundary and either one has to find the answer or accept defeat and give up. With 19 people having found the answers at varied time intervals and the rest having given up, these two are becoming examples of perseverance and determination by showing the world that any information can be found by searching online and one's brain does not have any necessity to be up there and be 'used'.  Meanwhile unconfirmed sources say that 'The Guy' is all set to feature on this year's TIME's cover earning him the title "The Brightest Dimwit of 2060".   

World Headlines in 2060 - America #2

"Barack Obama is set to receive his 10th Nobel Peace Prize, his first posthumously !!!"

    The most successful and powerful President, The United States has ever seen, is set to receive his 10th Nobel Peace Prize (posthumously of course) and there is no one in the history of Nobel Laureates to achieve and be recognized so much.  Some even say that if his achievements are listed out on A4 sheets at one deed per line, with the sheets clipped together making a link, it would be long enough to make a complete circle around the earth. But then he (Mr.Obama) just chided away such an idea when someone suggested just before his death as it seemed as a cheap publicity stunt in his eyes. He was aware of his 10th slated peace prize well in advance before his demise and even before the Nobel Peace Prize committee even sat down to list out the probables for this year and hence Mr.Obama has recorded a Nobel Peace Prize reception speech which would incidentally be the first of its kind in Nobel Laureates  history and it would be aired during the reception ceremony. 


         Remembering the first instance Mr.Obama was awarded the peace prize, a veteran Nobel Committee member was heard telling "We at the Nobel Peace Prize Committee were very much impressed on listening to his first run up to Presidency speeches, doting the slogan <Vote for Change>. We passed a resolution unanimously voting for a change in the way of giving away Nobel Peace Prizes too. The resolution was the idea of including those people who may possibly work in the future for the cause of maintaining or restoring peace around the world as a potential candidate for the Peace Prize and Barack Obama was the first and only such recipient till date to win a Nobel Prize that way." We do indeed hope that the world would become a Peace Haven with The United State's successful conquest of 'de-terrorizing'  78th consecutive country, as a tribute to Mr.Obama, who's soul will surely rest in peace, 10 times...!!!

World Headlines in 2060 - America #1

"A success for US in their war against terror as they find Weapons of Mass Destruction PHOTOS in N'Djamena, CHAD"

Photo Courtesy: US, Dept of State

         In a major breakthrough for the US in about 60 years of their WAR AGAINST TERROR, they finally proved their posthumous critics wrong after unearthing "Original photocopies" of hundreds of Weapons of Mass Destruction (WMD) photos. It is dubbed as the biggest haul by the US since the beginning of their war against terror that started way back in 2001, after the 9/11 attacks on the WTC twin towers. With this conquest of CHAD, one of the central part of the African Continent, US has just announced that "their hard work and strong goals in eradicating terrorism from the face of the Earth has just been rewarded soundly". This has instilled confidence in finding WMD in as soon as another 40 years. Highly placed sources quoting Intel reports suggested that now since entire Africa has been conquered sanitized by the US, they are almost certain that the WMD have been move to Europe or Asia by the Saddam Hussein loyalists. The US President is expected to fly to Ground Zero and make a speech from there, thanking all the 'wise minds' who've supported and stood beside them in this WAR AGAINST TERROR.