Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Are you REALLY Single???

      As on date some amongst us are either "committed" or "in-a-relationship" but without doubts most of us are still "single". Unfortunately only a few amongst these "singles" are TRULY so because they are the ones who're NOT on the look out for any such commitments or relationships whatsoever. Now here are three benchmark tests to self-assess whether you are TRULY single.
  • SMS test

    • This is a self-evaluative test.
    • Check whether you send someone an SMS and keep expecting a response back and if you don't get a response maybe you even get upset.
    • Also check whether you're sending SMS forwards to a specific person or "few people" quite frequently more than the regular list of Msg-to-be-shared-with gang. 
    • If so, after sending this, check whether you're not expecting to strike a conversation based on it. This check can be substituted with online chatting instead as well if you're an avid online person than a mobile person. If both then make the checks on either of them. 
    • If all is fair and square on this and none of these checks returned any specific reasons or answers on your mind, you've successfully passed this and edge a step closer in stating you are "Single" and yeah march on to the next test.
  • Phone call test

    • Similar to the previous one this is also self-evaluative.
    • Make a list of the frequent people you talk-to, over the phone. 
    • Chart out an approx amount of time spent talking to each person. 
    • Take the descending top ten of this list. 
    • Check whether any of the ones belonging to the "SMS test",  are on the list. 
    • Check for existence of conversations with people with whom you may tend to blush or feel out of words to talk-to but still don't disconnect.
    • If the result of these checks does not strike a chord, the probability of you being TRULY single is very close indeed and proceed to the final test.

  • Close-your-eyes test
    • Just relax, close your eyes, do nothing and stay at any comfortable posture for 5 mins (Time it, cos trust me 5 mins is a very long time for this activity).
    • This may look pretty simple however practically its otherwise.
    • If no guy/girl (be it your neighbor, friend, colleague, one noticed roadside or in a mall or theaters etc) holds your mind for more than a moment or two, then you are clean.
If you had taken these tests and had failed on any of it then its highly probable that you fall amidst one of "I Wish I Was Committed" or "Am I really single?" category and does have to reconsider your thoughts on your "Single" status portrayals and start working on the reasons for having failed these tests :). On the contrary if you're passing out with flying colors on these tests, you can pat yourself on your back and join the elite few of TRUE singles...!!!

    Tuesday, September 28, 2010

    The Ogle

    I raised my brow to have a look at him

    noticed at the corner of my eye that

    he too did the same.

    I decided to look straight eye to eye

    and we were transfixed until either of us were nudged.

    BANG!!! smashed a stone

    crashing down the mirror I was looking at, into pieces!!!

    Saturday, September 25, 2010

    How to make Indian Cinema become truly World's best???

             With the technological, financial and logistical advancements, the Indian Film industry has come a long way on the improvisation front and has no doubt begun to compete with the World class Hollywood biggies on who's movie is the best in its class. 

    Are we Indians capable of creating "THE MOVIE" that is way ahead of the present times which the world has NEVER seen or thought off, till date?

    I strongly think

    No, I'm not talking of Robot (a) எந்திரன்

    Here's how...

    Firstly lets look at the resources that we have got and if not, procure.

    1. The BIG BUCKS!!! - With the sky rocketing movie budget these days and time and again "The biggest budget Indian movie" record being re-written there is a definite conclusion here in India that MONEY is not an issue for making "THE MOVIE", anymore. That makes money as THE ONE.
    2. The Star Cast!!! - With umpteen movies out already in the recent times with scores of heroes across generations right from yesteryears to the present put altogether in a movie package, we do not have issues in making many STAR heroes (heroins ofcourse will, do they have a choice???) sign up for THE MOVIE. Also as and when applicable THE ONE can take care of "the ones" who refuse to accept the offer by ALL possible means. That makes the star cast as THE MANY.
    3. The Out-of-the-World Technology!!! - Having got THE ONE and THE MANY aboard, I do not see any obstacles in acquiring THE TECHNOLOGY (made at any cost from any corner of the globe) to be a part of  THE MOVIE, obviously.
    4. The Bits and Pieces!!! - When compared to the enormity of the above mentioned things,  the BEST of directors, music composers, editors, designers, cinematographer, art direction, marketing and what not... form THE SCRAP to fit into THE MOVIE making space.
    Now what is left is THE SPICE to make THE MOVIE become a never-heard-off-before experience.

    • The Salt - THE MOVIE should be shot for 6D, yeah you heard it right its 6D (including the sense of feel and smell as well as introducing the Artificial Intelligence (AI) as the 6th dimension).
    • The Butter - The screen play should be a sure shot winning plot involving maximum of two heroes, heroins and villains. THE MOVIE should be shot with at least three such set of heroes, heroins and villains and why so? follows next.
    • The Tastemaker © - Since the audience being fans to more than one hero or heroin or even villain (not so likely),  AI comes into the picture here. So here's how the AI experience will be. The movie goer walks into the theater, gets onto his/her couch, wears THE GOGGLES and selects the cast whom he/she wants to feature in the movie and the movie plays according to their preference. With these GOGGLES in place, THE MOVIE gets add-on USPs like the movie-goer will for sure watch it again and again for various reasons like their curiosity to mix and match the cast, being fans to more than one actor who're a part of the cast, just for the sake of THE GOGGLES experience and the list is endless and left to the exploration of the audience. Hence by hiking the ticket costs a bit more than what it is today the good old days of 100s of days ad Silver-Jubilee of the movies can be brought back, yet again with a loud BANG!!!  That sums up the ingredients of THE SPICE. 
    Will this one little step (if taken) by the Indian Cinema be one giant leap on the World Cinema?

    Which apparently will be answered by the audience and critics if THE MOVIE hits the world theaters.

    Thursday, September 23, 2010


    We were at this fancy restaurant,

    which was a full house, bustling with kids.

    We managed to get a table and 

    a cute boy aged around 12,

    walked up-to me and asked

    "Shall I clean the table??"

    I nodded in affirmation and asked "Why the big rush, today?"

    "Today's November 14th"

    he said, remorsefully!!!

    Tuesday, September 21, 2010

    Her Birthday

    It was her birthday

    and yet again it was time to tell her

    how much she meant to me.

    This time though,

    there were a lot of people around us

    from the common man to politicians,

    professionals to businessmen.

    In silence she listened to me unperturbed, till I finished,

    resting in peace amidst those celebrities.

    Monday, September 20, 2010


    There were hundreds of them,

    all busily working overtime.

    Suddenly came an attack out of nowhere

    killing most of them instantly

    while the injured and the lucky ones had to helter-skelter to safety.

    Only later I realized that the guy who walked in front of me

    had spit पान directly on that ant-hill.

    Saturday, September 18, 2010


    I've seen him enjoy and kill countless sisters of mine.

    It was my time now,

    Wrapped in pure white, I was led into his suite.

    He gasped and was spitting blood everywhere upon his third puff 

    and dropped down dead.

    With smoke still left in me,

    I rested with a sense of revenge and achievement.

    Thursday, September 16, 2010


    He did not mind coming wherever I took him along.

    He was so caring and protective of me be it day or night, rain or sunshine.

    "Is he your boyfriend?" my friend asked.

    "No but I think he should've been my boyfriend instead


    Umbrellas are really dependable compared to guys, these days", I replied!!!!

    Tuesday, September 14, 2010

    The Raid

    The bedroom was pretty dark,

    BANG!!!, The door opened.

    Policemen stormed in, turning on the lights.

    A couple lay there semi-nude.

    She hugged him in fright

    both looked drowsy unaware of what's happening.

    The Inspector exclaimed in joy

    "Isn't it really cute to see her guard her twin brother, being just an year old"

    Monday, September 13, 2010

    Adam and Eve - On Facebook

            In the genre of the previous one, here is another typical Adam and Eve episode and this time they're on Facebook.

    The Act

           Adam and Eve are on Facebook and they decide to chart out "What's on your mind?" and update their status and bet on whose status update is well received.

    The Reactions

    Sunday, September 12, 2010


    I was travelling in a bus,

    couldn't stop overhearing a conversation.

    "Are you sure you're really pregnant?????"

    "Yes, I am sure!!!!!"

    "Damn, that is why I asked you to take the pills but you didn't ..."

    Looking outside I saw a road-sign and

    I more than smiled within myself

    cos it said

    "Accident hurts, Prevention saves!!!"

    Friday, September 10, 2010

    The Proposal

    The music set the ambiance.

    She joined me dot on time, 

    Fine dining flowed with small talks and musings

    Her favorite Choco Fudge and my Vanilla Mousse arrived.

    Gazing into her eyes I said

    "I love you

    She moved real close,

    her brief silence left me breathless, 

    she replied 

    "Mmm...Vanilla tasted lovely this way"

    Wednesday, September 8, 2010

    The Masseuse

    I saw him settle down brimming with happiness.

    I was next.

    She sported a smile as she came close and picked me.

    Making quick movements she pressed my neck

    And the warmth quickly spread to my sleeves

    and to my abs.

    I enjoyed it while she folded my hands  


    moved onto the next shirt.

    Monday, September 6, 2010


    We both grew altogether right from our birth.

    We looked so alike

    In-fact we were looked upon as twins.

    We were nurtured and fed without a shred of partiality,

    irrespective of the person who did that.

    But WHY, did I land up decorating a stinking dead body

    whereas her,

    a gods' idol!!!

    Wednesday, September 1, 2010


    I liked what she told me about herself.

    Her interests seemed to match with my preferences.

    Even her zodiac sign was in-sync with mine

    Of-course she was looking really pretty

    and I asked her - "Can we be friends?"

    She remained silent 

    And even after many days I found her status to be

    "Awaiting friend confirmation"
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