Thursday, October 20, 2011

World Headlines in 2060 - World #1

"A guy finds his dad via Google search in 30 seconds"




"What The Guy did in 30 seconds was truly a spectacular feat and I am sure there aren't many in this world who could do that these days"- Google CEO

         In a dramatic event that unfolded at the 30th World's Toughest Quiz, The Guy (he wanted to withhold his name and preferred to be called The Guy) in his early 30s won the coveted "Challenger of the Year" with a prize purse of $100000. In the annual event organized by Google across the globe, the contestants are confined to a room where they have access to any and all latest gadgets and technologies.  They can get to choose any mode of finding the answer and just one thumb rule is that they cannot ask any other human, by any means. The final hurdle set this time was "How quick can you correctly say who your dad is?".  There were 47 finalists this year and apparently this question was rated tougher than last years question of "How fast can you say 'I am a dumb ass', 50 times?" The Guy was able to complete the challenge in just 30 seconds and walk away with the title. 


        When asked about his experience at the final round he said "I knew I was too good with Google, Google+, Facebook etc but then when this question was put forth to me, I went totally blank. It was something which I haven't thought about in my entire life and hence it took some precious 15 to 20 seconds of searching, to narrow down on who my mom was and then the remaining time was used in stalking her profile narrowing down to my dad.  Luckily my dad looked like me, else I would have lost on the contest. My heart goes out to the determined two who're still trying to figure out the answer, 4 hours into the contest."


     As the rules of this contest states there is no time boundary and either one has to find the answer or accept defeat and give up. With 19 people having found the answers at varied time intervals and the rest having given up, these two are becoming examples of perseverance and determination by showing the world that any information can be found by searching online and one's brain does not have any necessity to be up there and be 'used'.  Meanwhile unconfirmed sources say that 'The Guy' is all set to feature on this year's TIME's cover earning him the title "The Brightest Dimwit of 2060".   

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Top Five Ways To Eradicate Poverty In India


      Wikipedia defines Poverty as "The state of one who lacks a certain amount of material possessions or money"Its been 60+ years now since India has been attached with this tag of being a poverty ridden Independent Country. Its high time this situation is addressed once and for all. Being 'a responsible citizen' of this nation its my duty to put my best foot forward in marching towards eradicating poverty. The following is my Panchsheel which would 'eradicate' poverty. 

  • Calling Representatives - An easy and age old way is first to identify the poverty ridden regions and then its representatives. Call them for a meeting and buy them out one by one and if you can completely appease the entire section and bring them to your side, the problem is solved and these representatives would take care that no more in future someone would raise a voice telling there are poor and suffering people.  
  • FDI Strategy - Identify the poorest village, take away land from the locals. Give it at throwaway leases to MNCs across industrial verticals to invest and setup industries, which in turn makes the real estate boom, land value increase, Malls come up and the locals can be inducted into the workforce and boom, the village becomes rich in spending and lifestyle.
  • Mass Movement - Take a census of the approximate number of people who're poor, clear up a State (that borders with another country) and move all the poor people to this state. Reach out to TRS party's Chandrashekar Reddy's book of "Creation of New State for DUMMIES". Else use the existing states like Jammu & Kashmir or Arunachal Pradesh and once the migration of all the poor people is complete, disown the state and give them  to Pakistan or China respectively, which would solve the border issues as well make India free of poverty.
  • Media Bluff - Buy out any and all forms of Media (for this cause as well) and make them propagate to  the world to believe that India is a poverty free country and most importantly close all gaps to prevent the International Media from finding the truth. I think 'The Namesake Gandhi' family has pioneered in this feat and just that they have to extend their support and knowledge for this cause too.
  • Rajapakse's Guide  - If none of the previous ones works out in eradicating poor, fly to Sri Lanka and talk to Mahindra Rajapakse. Remember this is the Brahmaastra, so use it only when all others fail. He will guide everyone who seeks his help on 'How to commit mass murders of innocent people with compelling evidence and still hold the head high with a sense of achievement'.

       Each of the above policies is a novel approach which may be suffice to achieve the goal as a stand-alone. However if doesn't work out that way, its wise to use combinations of all of these and make our country 'a better place' to live in. After all one need to eradicate the cause (poor people) in order for the effect (poverty) to cease to exist.

Monday, August 22, 2011

Who Am I? #8


Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link
--------------------------------------


I come along wherever you go,

sometimes you notice and some other times you don't..

I remain a challenge to a fraternity,

for years together now. 

You would be surprised to realize that I am a cool celebrity,

cos neither do I tweet nor do I have a Fan page.
--------------------------------------
Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Between Mom and Kid(s)









She gave me the land,

water and the air,

the opportunity to earn and live peacefully.

Unimpressed, I blamed and ditched her, 

cared the least

and hastily moved out.

Years passed by, 

I missed her a lot and eventually came back.

She gave me the land, water and air

without a shred of dissent.

Note :This post is a syndication to my article published on Thoughts On Sale at this link.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

VIDHURAN by MacTrics - A Review


             I'm still awestruck and gaping, yet to come out having experienced a truly vivid display of sheer performance, at its best of coordination and execution. Having said that, in my humble opinion every performer or rather every person who has been a part of this theatrical production has to completely believe and go by the spirit that "What I did was not my best, what I've learnt and gonna do next could be my best". In that spirit of the game here's my take on what went right and what went wrong, where the right should be taken in the humble spirit of acceptance of appreciation and pride should not find a place and wrong should be taken as a scope of improvement of one's respective contribution and nothing personal.

  • MacTrics - The Mummers
    • You were the pillars both metaphorically and literally.
    • As the entire part of yours involves a high degree of precision and timing, being the audience I did not see even a bit of that been missed out or delayed.
    • Though the entire performance involved a lot of physicality there was not a compromise on the expressions at various points that required.
    • I especially loved the expression of the girl who played Draupadi Kunthi during the moment where a Vidhuran's man would fall at their feet pleading them not to go to the palace and she would be the last to leave and I felt her reaction was just priceless mixed with anxiety, confusion, worry, concern etc.
    • The quick regroups portraying the flash back, the mirrored maze and final exit from the cave were my pick of best of formations and executions.
  • Dancers
    • Firstly, the idea of portrayal of dangers bound for Pandavas via a dance form, was a commendable and novel interpretation.
    • The expressions at varied points enhanced by the well synchronized lighting was just a visual treat.
    • The single beat of foot tapping resonating out of 10 feet altogether at many instances was an audible testimony to the coordination with which you girls performed.
    • A few instances of gestural and hand movement miss of coordination were seen which apparently is not a big issue however it just does not give the tag of being called a flawless one.
  • The Joker
    • The way The Joker began (circling the audience and making stunts) really set the mood of the audience to get hooked to the performance right from the word go.
    • There was that variety of expressions delivered by you at different points in the monologue which was doing justice to the role however your dialogues could not keep pace with that clarity.
    • The subsequent monologue transitions from the mime began to be felt like more of a dip in the attention level rather than increase or maintenance to the audience energy levels. However the course of monologue "managed" to uplift the energy levels towards the end of each of it just before being transitioned into mime again.
    • The monologue as such was a long one and with many of the line endings being said twice and sometimes even more, made it even more dragging. 
    • I felt it would have been better if The Joker finished just the way he started, circling around the audience and exiting finally.
  • Background Score
    • I must say that MacTrics have been what they are, with a huge role of such a wonderful and talented mind behind, scoring the music tracks.
    • The music indeed has been the string that held and moved the puppets (Mummers & Dancers) in the way it is supposed to.
    • The expectation bars have been raised and the next time it would be a lot more.
  • Lights & Sound
    • If Victor Paulraj had done this feat I would have said, "His experience and versatility has done it again", however it was Charles who did the magic and its truly laudable.
    • The inexperience, 20+ meters of distance from the stage, swift light change queues did not cause even a bit of downtrend in the commitment and quality of his deliverable.
    • Way to go Charles, hoping to see you create much more wonders in the future.
    • Just a concern was the stage blue lights when The Joker walked in during every mime to monologue transition. I felt it was not necessary and the show would've gone good with a black out instead, each time.
  • The Marketing
    • I guess it was the toughest challenge to the MacTrics throughout the entire production.
    • I feel MacTrics (one of a kind in this city, at least) truly needs a lot more support from this crew.
    • Maybe the ones here need to get to the drawing boards and start from scratch if need be, for branding and reaching out to the best, for the future MacTrics productions.
  • Shutter Monkeyz
    • Being the video and promo partner, I understand it was the first attempt at something of this sorts and there is quite a lot of learning you guys have to take away from this.
    • Promotions these days are of much reach and ease more on social network than anywhere, hence you should have done a lot more on that front. Probably teaming up with the Marketing team at some points would have given better results.
  • Stage Manager
    • Managing the stage with such an enormous cast being entirely present almost the whole of showtime is no easy task and I must appreciate the work done by the one responsible and it was truly commendable.
  • The Monologue Writers
    • No doubt that the script as such was well written and the crowd's applause and appreciation at many a time is the proof for that.
    • However in my opinion there were certain elements that were either not thought off or rather overlooked which did not make the The Joker's role on par with the performance of the mime and dance.
    • There's this fine line of cohesion and comfort that should be there between the performer and the script which I felt was lacking to some extent. The script as such was good and well written, The Joker as such was a good performer however these two coming together did not deliver that punch expected out of a monologue and need to be really worked out together, moving forward.
  • The Concept
    • The message that MacTrics wanted to send out to the audience was truly a practically viable and needed one, drawing parallels from VIDHURAN from Mahabharatha and hats off to you folks for choosing this.
    • I felt the audience could have been more informed of what's coming on the show maybe in the form a prelude via something as simple as a handout while they walked in, so that they can be a little aware of what's in store for them because what's been performed on stage was something which they have  to relate and assimilate without a blink and stay engrossed. On top of all these expecting the audience to catch the connect on what's the message being told in the end all by themselves is a bit too much to expect out of them.
    • The length of the monologue each time and the switches between monologue and mime transitions could have been crispier.
  • The Director
    • Last but definitely not the least, it was a fabulous and well orchestrated show and you can pat yourself and your team for such a brave and daring attempt at a showcase on something that was as different as this.
    • As a follower of MacTrics performances I would expect the next direction to be totally different and most importantly not involve any of the formations or representations that I've seen already.
    • Probably that's a huge challenge and well that is what MacTrics is all about, in my opinion.
      Definitely living to true spirits of what MacTrics believed this production of VIDHURAN to be, it made justice by being a show that was never seen or attempted before in the theatrical arena. Congratulations to the team MacTrics, yet again...!!!

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Jayalalitha's CODE of Governance



    The following is the code of conduct that Jayalalitha have been following since ADMK government came to power, a few months ago. The code is in a very abstract format with each of its functions being delegated, compiled and executed independently and reported back to you know whom.






#include "DMDK.h"
#include "Communist_Parties.h"


float alliance_with_Congress;
float alliance_with_BJP;
float aligning_to_third_front;


void ADMK_random(one parameter);


void Jaya_tv() {


    ADMK_random(accuse_DMK);
    report_faults_with_DMK();
    report_measures_of_ADMK();
    report_complaints_about_DMK();
    report_thanks_to_Jayalalitha(); 
    ADMK_random (report_scams);
}


int main () {


   for ( int month=1; month<=60; month++) {  
            for(int week=1; week<=4; week++) {
                       for(int day=1; day<=7; day++) { 
                             Jaya_tv();
                       } //End of a day


                       Introduce_new_schemes(at_various_sectors);   
                       report_thanks_to_Jayalalitha();
                       ADMK_random(alter_previously_introduced_schemes);
                       ADMK_random(file_case_against_predecessors);
                       ADMK_random(shuffle_cabinet_ministers);
                       ADMK_random(shuffle_secretaries_IPS_IAS_officers);


            } //End of a week


           ADMK_random(seek_Central_reserves_for_funds);
           ADMK_random(meet_media_Press_people);
           ADMK_random(Call_on_some_politician_on_a_friendly_note);    
           ADMK_random(Support_Central_Govt_policies);
           ADMK_random(Oppose_Central_Govt_policies);


   }//End of a month


return government;
}



void ADMK_random(one parameter) {

   /*
    * 
    *
    * 
    *
    * 
    *  Proprietary code, not for public access
    *  
    *  
    * 
    * 
    */
}

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Mumbai Triple Blasts, a treat to Ajmal on his B'day?


          As investigators and government agencies are accounting the triple blasts that rocked Mumbai yesterday (13th July, 2011), it seem to have a surprising motive behind it, sources reveal. One, this blast having happened on the B'day of Ajmal Kasab and two being the following story.

          Owing to his recent feeling of loneliness, Ajmal Kasab divulged his intent of wanting a roommate to the ATS and Mumbai Police, from his Arthur Road Jail residence. Further inquiring into this we got hold of a copy of hand written request from Kasab via an anonymous source. The hand-written sheet was in broken hindi and it took us a day to translate it into readable English format, thanks to Google Transliterate. Following is the order that Kasab apparently handed over to his residence security chiefs and pressed on for a quick resolution to his concern, from them.

"Hello Security Chief,

  As you might be aware, its so boring here at my house and off all the things this idleness and lonliness is killing me for the past two plus years. I cannot take it anymore and I've decided that I need a roommate ASAP. Here are the set of qualities I want to see in my roommate, so that you people don't bring in any Tom, Dick and Harry as a prospective roommate.


  1. I would want someone who has achieved something in terrorism if not phenomenal to the extent of what I did but at least some legacy in terrorism or done something in the recent past.
  2. The person should not be well known as I do not want to lose the limelight that I possess, in the process of taking him in as my roommate. 
  3. See I am from a "spot, shoot and kill" form of terror background and hence I do not want someone from a similar background and would be happy if he's from other forms say like hijacking or bomb planting, biological warfare etc so that I could discuss and get to learn of his domain from his experience and expertise.
  4. He should not be some old guy or with medical complications, cos come on man I don't want a roommate who would die in another two years but want one who would live along for years to come and enjoy the luxury provided.
  5. I would prefer an Indian or unaccepted Pakistani like me as a roommate, if not there might be chances for my roommate to be extradited in the name of investigations and I would come to square one again.
  6. Also what's more important is that, my prospective roommates should be clearly briefed that I have the upper hand with respect to taking decisions being here at my Arthur Road Jail residence, cos he should know and always remember that he's seeking shelter in the palace which I originally built.
Your Lord,
Kasab"

   It seems the document had ten commandments and Kasab did not want the last four points to be "leaked" to the news media so that the prospective roommates don't get "prepared" just to become his roommate. Another revelation from the anonymous source was that the ATS had this abridged version faxed to all terrorist producing agencies so as to address the genuine concern of Kasab at the earliest.


  After the sensational triple blast that happened yesterday, the agencies like ATS, CBI, NSG & NIA are leaving no stones unturned in finding out the ones behind these blasts in-spite of the really bad weather prevailing in and around Mumbai. They are speculating on the fronts whether these blasts, which were ironically and coincidentally carried out on Kasab's birthday, was an attempt to make Kasab notice and probably pick a roommate from the perpetrators of this. Lets wait and watch as there are lots more to unfold in the weeks to come...

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Who Am I? #7


Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link
--------------------------------------

I came into this world very recently

compared to others in my genre.

My popularity is well spread out with my backing 

in scores and scores of varied avenues, at large.

Many, in this part of the world 

consider me as a prideful possession.

You cannot understand me, if you don't know me.
--------------------------------------
Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Who Am I? #6


Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link
--------------------------------------

I am the brain and I am the heart

but to the brains and hearts behind me

I am their child.

Some are secretive while some others are open

but most of them are solely lucrative about me.

My by-birth "efficiency" fuels the GDP of some nations.
--------------------------------------
Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link

Monday, June 13, 2011

Who Am I? #5


Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link
--------------------------------------



I do not have a specific use, to a layman

however science and entertainment have used me well.

Animals use me to very limited levels

while man harnessed me to the fullest, with his creativity.

You don't depend on me 

nor do I seek your help,

but we're made for each other, forever.
--------------------------------------
Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Who Am I? #4


Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link
--------------------------------------


I can throw you off balance,

I can hold you grounded as well.

I can instill confidence and support

but that's not what I am for.

You can be happy forever,

if you know when, where and with whom to use me.
--------------------------------------
Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link

Monday, June 6, 2011

Who Am I? #3


Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link
--------------------------------------




I am a bunch of thin fibres,

but I'm not edible though.

I protect the twin towers,

 for reasons aplenty.

I am the last wall of fortress to breach,

for an assailant who comes-in from down under.

--------------------------------------
Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Who Am I? #2


Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link
--------------------------------------


My absence throws many out of business,

while celebrations take a beating.

I can cause you immense pain,

whereas I can be soothing too.

I can kill you without a trace,

I can protect you too.
--------------------------------------
Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Who Am I? #1

Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link
--------------------------------------


I am neither the Police nor the Military

but I've prevented possible wars.

I am neither Elvis Presley nor Micheal Jackson

but decedents of mine have given many,

 some of the best moments of their lives.

 Shy, Silent, Embarrassed & Ignorant

are some adjectives

that describe the mood of conversations involving me.
--------------------------------------

Series Synopsis - Blog Link / FB Link


 
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